Taking control of my body and destiny

I remember the feelings I had last year when I had my appointment to see Mr Phillip Thomas at the Charing Cross gender identity clinic, a few days before it was confirmed that I had cancer and would have to go into hospital to have a tumour removed.

At the time it felt like the end of the world, but I saw that it was the only option.

At the time I could not afford to fund my own Gender Reassignment Surgery (GRS) and was in the hands of the NHS gods as to how my surgery would end up, I have heard a whole mix of good, bad, indifferent and the bad horror stories of the outcome of surgery, from lack of vaginal depth, to no clitoral hood being constructed to lack of sensation, or a very good cosmetic looking vagina but not functional.

I have also seen the results of surgery, and the one that always impressed me was the work of Dr Suporn from Thailand, which gives three important things

· Clitoral Sensation

· Appearance

· Vaginal depth.

I do want a healthy sex life if possible after my surgery, and trust me you would not know the difference between Dr Suporns work and that of a genetic female.

So fast forward 14 months and could that let down of been a blessing in disguise.

With my pay off from work I can now fund my GRS.

I am very careful with money and also need to keep under a certain threshold to claim my benefits.

But even being care with money over time it can whittle down, so why not take control of my body and also the most important surgery of my life?

So I sent a email to Dr Suporn’s clinic and got a reply back with the procedures they need (below)

SRS Patients

ALL patients undergoing SRS MUST provide an original, signed document from a qualified psychiatrist or psychosexual specialist, confirming as a minimum that:

1. They have been diagnosed with Gender Identity Dysphoria.

2. SRS is indicated in their case, and is the recommended treatment.

Ideally, the referral should also confirm that:

3. They have been living full time as a woman for at least 12 months prior to surgery or - if not - gives an explanation as to why that has not been possible in your case. It is accepted that in some countries the “Real Life Test” (RLT) is not a practical possibility.

4. They have been undertaking a course of female hormone replacement therapy (HRT) unless there are medical reasons (to be indicated) that such a course is not advised in your case.

The letter must show the name, address and telephone number of the signee, for possible verification

In order to ensure that there are no difficulties with the documentation that you have, please make sure that you scan the letter and send it to me as an email attachment for review, to make sure it meets the necessary requirements. It is essential that you bring the original with you when you come for surgery (or that the original is sent to us direct). It will not be possible to go ahead with the SRS operation without such a suitable letter.

There are no exceptions to this requirement. Any patient who arrives without this evidence will not be permitted to undergo surgery. If you have difficulty with providing such evidence, please contact The Suporn Clinic by email, so we can discuss possible ways of meeting this requirement.

Additionally, if the referral letter from the psychosexual specialist does not specify as in items (3) and (4) above, we require you separately to provide evidence that you:

· Have had treatment with feminizing hormones (HRT) and/or anti-androgens for a period of 12 months prior to surgery; unless there is a medical reason why to do so would not be advised in your case.

· Have lived full time in your acquired gender for a period of at least 12 months prior to surgery, evidenced by at least 2 original documents ( ** ), unless there are clearly given and acceptable reasons why this is not possible or practical in your case, or why a lesser period has been spent prior to surgery.

( ** ) Documentary evidence needs only to be sufficient to show the patient's acquired (female) name, and bear a date at least 12 months prior to surgery. Suitable examples would be - but are not restricted to - passport, driver's licence, official ID card, household utility bill, bank statement...etc.

This is part of a longer letter, but I did have scanned onto my hard drive my letters re my surgery, change of name, proof of when I started my “real life test” and more.

I got a reply back, in my follow up letter I explained about my surgery, but have an all clear, Dr Suporn is checking re my “whipple procedure” surgery (Please keep your fingers crossed for me.)

I have also enquired about breast augmentation and will also get this done if accepted as a patient.

January 26^th 2011 is the date pencilled in for my surgery; I would arrive in Thailand January 23^rd for my pre surgery tests etc and stay there for 30 days, 7-8 in hospital, and the rest in the hotel near the clinic.

17 Weeks or 119 days to go.

I await the confirmation from Dr Suporn.

I am not in the slightest bit nervous, excited yes, and to have my body as I want it and the horrible thing gone would make my dreams come true.